Stupid

As one foot emerged from the shower this morning, the door bursts open and I encounter a 5 year old with a hot and bothered agenda: "Dad!" 
"Yes, Caedyn.  I am right here.  Should you not be finishing your breakfast?"
"Megan called me 'stupid'."
"Okay, obviously you are not stupid, conversely you are rather cute.  So, why don't you lock and load your miniwheats and let me dry off because I am dripping wet and mom typically prefers that I put on a towel before we handle problems."
"But Dad, Megan called me 'stupid'."
"Ah yes.  I realize that she..."
"Aannnddd... she's not supposed to say 'stupid'."
"Again, I understand..."
"I love you daddy."
"Thank you Caedyn, I.."
"Bye daddy."

Done.  Gone.  I was still frantically trying to get a towel out of the cupboard because in the midst of my profound conversation with Caedyn, Carla noticed I was lacking coverage of any type and yelped "Scott, she can see your area."   Mind you, by the time that 5 year old Prime Ministeral candidate presented her platform and left the building.  On top of that, since I was delayed in my drying off ceremony and slightly stunned at my lack of ability to acquire a towel in time, the dog saw his window off opportunity and started licking the water off my toes.  I am still vomiting in my mouth over that one.

After dabbing myself with some toilet paper and Q-tips I found some clothes and started the fretful...
I ran into Megan at the top of the stairs.
"Megs, did you call Caedyn stupid?"
"Yep."
"Okay.  Um, are you supposed to call her stupid?"
"Nope."
"Megs.  I don't call you stupid."
"No but sometimes you call Koda stupid." 
"Okay.  But that's because he licks my toes when they are wet and barks everytime a blessed leaf blows by the window."
"That's not what we are talking about sweetheart.  You are just not supposed to call your sister that.  You know better."
"Daddy, you just don't understand."

Tears start flowing down the cheeks.  I kid you not.  Flowing.

"Oh Megan.  What is wrong?"
"It's just that I did call her stupid, but it was because she was on top of the counter and she almost knocked her cereal off the over and spilled milk everywhere and she always does that and I told her to get down and she wouldn't and then I told her she was going to fall and then she just jumped and fell on the floor and she started crying and holding her leg and she got up limping and I thought she broke her leg and I was so scared because she is my little sister and I just love her so much and so I told her she was stupid."

"Please hug me daddy."

Typically I am not known to have difficulty with words.  But this one....  I kid you not, as I sit here typing this, I still have no clue what to say.  Nothing.  Zip.  And the next moment they were hugging and jumping and helping each other get ready for kids camp.   

Apparently I am super awesome at solving things even if I have no clue what they are.